Monday, May 09, 2011

Where Have We BEEN???

Long story. I know, it's been a while and well, a lot has happened over the years. Job changes, moving into our house, kids coming and going, struggling with relationship issues ~ you name it. Ok, for the short version. We both work very hard and I am pursuing my bachelor's degree as a full time student in addition to full time employee. This in itself has put quite a strain on us. The thing is, John has been entirely supportive. I just get stressed out. I am a perfectionist and my grades HAVE to be awesome. They have been... hehehe. Majoring in software systems engineering is not easy. Oh boy, is that an understatement. I'm taking 2-3 classes at a time in order to get my degree in 3 years instead of 4. Brutal. So in the last 2 years I have been taking as much time away from the computer as I can after the usual 12 or more hours a day I am on it for work or school. Hence, the omissions from updating our story as it has unfolded.

On a happy note, we are doing GREAT! We had a period there where I was doubting. I have some serious trust issues and sometimes it is easier for me to decide something is not good enough, or right, than it is to accept that I have something I am afraid of losing. Well, I have been awful to poor John and he stuck through it all and we are definitely stronger for it.

Now I won't go so far as to say that meeting someone online is definitely the way to go. Many of our challenges still come from our cultural differences and the 'physical' learning about each other's habits and backgrounds. While we have less problems with communication as a whole than most couples I suppose, since we were busy doing that while a 'traditional' meeting and relationship setting would have allowed for the physical part. Still, since we started our journey we have found maybe one or two other couples who met online and are still together. None that have come as far as we have and over as long a period of time, but still, they exist. More so now than ever. Where else do you meet anyone these days? Bars are full of people, but you have to make sure the lifestyle they present is one that is agreeable to you. The library? Yeah, right. I mean, it's possible I suppose, but really?

Facebook is becoming a way for mutual friends to hook up. At least there you can learn a bit about someone BEFORE they've met you - and know that is the real them - since most people will somewhat 'tailor' themselves to the person they want to date. In fact, the more I think about it, that's an excellent benefit of meeting someone and becoming friends on established Facebook pages.

Our life is good. Very good lately in fact. Things have settled down for us and we are focused now on 'living' our life. We have good weekends with the kids and the dogs and friends. We work around the house. We cook (when he lets me...lol)... and we deal with all the normal stuff people deal with. We have even been called a pattern for the perfect married couple by close friends. How about that?


Lovin' it...

Buttercup

Sunday, May 01, 2011

Time has FLOWN by....

We are still in love. My daughter sits next to me and is amazed at this blog. She didn't realize how much was written and how much we had gone through that is documented in this place. As I read through a few of the comments with her I realized that in some way we not only were doing this for ourselves, but for those others out there who may share our experiences in a similar manner. It is with these thoughts that I have decided to revisit, no - resume, the story as it continues to unfold.

I will have to qualify that first sentence now. Everyone knows that you fall in love with someone, but that kind of love fades into a different kind of love, right? Well, that's what I mean then. We have come from being hopelessly and desperately in love to loving one another in a way that often causes us to smile at one another with a sign of remembrance of that desperation and that added ingredient shines through in our smiles - the added thing that says "we have come through the fire...and we are still alive!"

I'm excited about picking this back up...

Buttercup